The Cullen Men Go Mad
by The Bedroom Writer
Summary: Bella see's the Cullen men on a bad day...


The Cullen man had been acting weird all week every since I had asked them about their human lives. I had got a call from Edward asking me to come over, I should have picked up that something was wrong by the tone of his voice, he had sounded different but I could not for the life of me figure out why.

I was making my way down their overgrown driveway when a loud bang make me jump, I pulled over, got out to check that it wasn't my truck making the noise, when I saw that there was smoke coming from just above the trees, I started to make my way toward it when out of nowhere Jasper came in to view....riding a horse?? He stopped in front of me and dismounted, he was wearing I'm sure one of his old army uniforms, "Ma'am, it's not save for a lady to be out here alone, they be Yankees in these woods" he said in his southern accent that was thicker the normal. I just stood there staring at him in shock for a minute to two, "for me I must have scared you, let me take you out of the woods to a safer place" he said, the next thing I know I was on the back of his horse galloping through trees. After about 5 minutes we suddenly stopped, so suddenly that I fell off the back of Jasper's horse I braced myself to hit the ground, but was caught in a pair of strong cold arms. I looked up to see that none other than Carlisle had caught me, "Tis a fair madden" he said in British accent. "Oh god" I said, he looked at me confused, he looked around, "tis no god here my lady, the nearest church is no less the 20 Leeds away" he said like it was the simplest thing in the world. Now it was my time to look confused, "Is something wrong my lady, are thou not well?" he asked me touching my forehead, "we must get you back to the house at once" and with that I found myself being helped in to a carriage pulled by two horses. Until that time I hadn't notice what he was wearing but now I saw, he was wearing what I would assume he wore back in the 1500, puffy pants and all. When we made it to the house he opened the door and helped me out, "this is where I must bid you fair well" he kissed my hand and disappeared in the trees. I stood there for a minutes to try and wrap my head around what just happened, I shook my head and made my way to the door, I went to open it but it opened before I had even touch it, Edward came into view, it was Edward but not the Edward that I knew he was wearing a neatly pressed suit, his normal fly away hair was smoothed down and parted to one side. But the most surprising thing was his eyes, they were green! I just stood there staring at him, "Miss? Are alright?" he asked politely. I didn't answer, "Miss?" he asked again, "Huh?" that all I could say as I stood there in disbelief. There was a gust of wind, I shivered and for a moment I saw a glimpse of my Edward in this man's handsome face. "We must get you inside I hear that there is a flu going around" he said smiling offering his arm to me. I took it unwilling all of my senses yelling at me to run away, telling me that they have all finally gone mad. When we got inside ho took me into the lounge room, 'Edward, can't we go to your room?" I asked. The look on his face was priceless, his eyes pooped and he kind of blushed. His mouth was slightly apart before he answered, "Excuse me? Go to my room without a chaperon??" he stammered. I heard a car pull up, a ran to the window to find Alice, Rosalie and Esme crossing the lawn that separated the house from the garage. Why, oh why did they have to pick today the go shopping, of all days? Alice came around the corner of the lounge room, "Bella?" she said taking in my facial expression and by the looks of it Edwards too. "Alice!" I cried running over to her, I caught her in a hug. "Thank god! I have no idea what's wrong with them! They have all gone mad or something" I said still hugging her. Esme had made her way around the corner of the lounge room too, "Where are they" she asked almost bored looking out of the window into the woods. "I don't know, Jasper is out there riding around on a horse, Carlisle is driving a carriage and Edward is in the lounge room have a heart attack and I have no idea where the hell Emmett is!" said without taking a breath. But as if on cue the Cullen man came through the door, "ladies" Jasper said dipping his hat, 'Fair Madams" said Carlisle bowing and Edward "Afternoon" bowing his head. Alice and Esme laughed, Rosalie was more concerned with something else, "Where's Emmett?"She asked. On hearing his name Emmett came jumping down the stairs dressed in a complete vintage football uniform holding a football under his arm. "Any of you dolls up for a game?" he asked cheerfully.

The Cullen Man has finally gone mad.


End file.
